181: Wooden hearted and dumb: Clearly he is referencing that terrible translation he loved so much of Valentroika's Russian epic, "Uncle Winter," in which the author melodes that "when my mother's voice grew unheard my heart/became cold as wood/laid in the ground for millennia."
It is well documented that the author obsessed over the untimely sickness of his mother in a manner similar to other pre-debauchist outlawed writers such as E. A. Poe, even going so far as to refer to himself as such.
If I were to catch fire
for any/some thing, burn my love out bright and hot;
I'd be left with ashes, the taste
of ashtray in my mouth as though I'd loved
a smoker. (The bastard!)
Mother lying on the couch coughing fire,
the death of applause. Father puddled on the floor,
paycheck spent on modeling glue. Sisters, brothers.
Burn the couch, the television…